Take Away

Take Away

Take away my things
Take away my pride
Take away my smile
Take away my laugh
Take away my self-respect
Take away my courage
Take away my love
Take away my happiness
Take away my tears
Take away my truth
Take away my friends
Take away my sanctuary
Take away my sanity
Take away my music
Take away my breath
Take away my soul
Take away my life

Take away everything I am but that only
Takes away my love for you

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NaNoWriMo complete!

So … I finished NaNoWriMo yesterday! 50,000 words, eight days … I feel like the living dead but it’s all good! The book needs serious editing, I really hated my main character but I can handle that. It helps that for the past eight days I’ve had nothing to do with my life because I got a break from school.

Of course, now my question is why in the world did I finish in eight days? To say I could? To win the competition going on between my friends? Probably both, but a word to the wise? It’s a lot more fun when you have to fight to win. I’ll admit, NaNo this year wasn’t particularly fun. More like a rushed job done in between two huge deadlines all while battling some depressing forces.

Well, what’s done is done I suppose. Next year, I’m taking the entire month.

Now … to go EDIT this monstrosity…

Why I’m Here

(FYI, this piece was written off a prompt for “Why are you here?” and to make it as crazy, bragging and laugh-inducing as possible. It’s a wonderful thing to do when you’re feeling down, I promise!)

Why I’m Here

Because I am 16
And I haven’t lived yet
I’m here because I have just self-published a book
And I want to sell a million copies
I haven’t seen Japan yet
I haven’t learned to ride a motorcycle yet
But I am the manager of a 50 person dining room
And the editor of a magazine with 3,000 people who read it
I haven’t seen all my friends face-to-face yet
And no one’s able to fly
And I want recognition
Happiness
Love
And peace
But I’m still trying to figure out what all that means
I’m here because my brothers need me
I’m here because my parents want me
No one can fix broken bonds yet
But I want to be the first one
And I want to see a world of peace
With no pollution
War
or greed
And I’m going to make that happen
I am here because I haven’t signed an agent
I haven’t found a publisher
But someday I want to see my title be a NY Times bestseller
I am here because I want to live
And my dreams have stopped the darkness in my heart
I am here because I have something to say
And I haven’t said enough yet

Thursday Poets’ Rally Wk 31 – Tug of War

This is my piece of wk 31 of the Thursday Poets’ Rally over at Jingles. Check it out here: http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/10/20/thursday-poets-rally-week-31-october-21-27/

Tug of War

What’s a battle of tug of war
Between friends?
I assure you
It isn’t innocent
When you are using me as your rope
I’ve listened to his side
I’ve listened to hers
But how the hell
Did I get in the middle?
He attacks her
Using me
She needles him
Using me–
Excuse me!
Don’t I have a say?
Can’t I protest?
Guess not…
But friends
Let me warn you
I’ve been wrung around
This torture wheel before
And I don’t put up with this anymore

The Sea of the Forgotten

The Sea of the Forgotten

I sail out my boat
Into the sea of the forgotten
Despairing for the abundance of new inhabitants
The friends tossed aside have nearly tripled
The missed birthdays are one greater
The ignored achievements are disgustingly large
The unheard words are wailing death

My boat is an old rusty thing to be sure
With a hole right through its core
It sinks slowly as I sit and watch
A fishing pole in my hand
For while I am sinking into the black depths
I continue to hold on to my rod of hope
That one day I’ll reel in enough of me to keep afloat

September 21st – Falling Apart

Falling Apart

Fall apart, World
Go ahead
Watch me care
Are you crumble around me
Watch me laugh
At your icy silence
Watch me grow stronger
When you hurt me
What me hold the tears
As you let sorrow rain
Watch me do it all alone
If you take away my friends
Go ahead, World
Watch me fall apart

August 16th – Call Me a Coward

Call Me a Coward

Call me a coward
Please
It’s simpler
It’s what I do
When given the chance
I have no faith in me
But that’s okay
It’s safe
It’s good
Call me a coward

Call me a coward
Please
Believe me
Don’t make me do things
That scare me
So what
If you think I can do it
I don’t
I know best
Call me a coward

Call me a coward
Why won’t you
You push me out of my comfort zone
You give me no choice
I do what you say
No matter how frightening
No matter how dangerous
Because I have no options
But I beg you
Call me a coward

Call me a coward
Thank all that you won’t
Now I see
What I can do
THat maybe I can
Do more than I think
And I’ve got some courage
Somewhere deep inside
I’m so glad you could see it
Now call me a coward

I dare you

July 30th – Mediator, Traitor

Look, the poem that was supposed to be here days ago!

Mediator, Traitor

They call me the Peacekeeper
The friend in the middle
The sibling in the center
Holding up the caution flags
Mediating a truce
They tell me that I’m wonderful
That I’m a true friend
But I don’t feel the same

I don’t want to be the one
Sorting out the facts
I don’t want to be the one
Taking all the blows
I don’t want to be the one
On whom you unload all your crap

I hate to break it to you
But I’m not bulletproof

I love you
I love her
I love him
I love them
But after all this time
Somehow I’ve lost my love of me

You say I play the mediator
But I call myself a traitor
Because I’ve lost my own sense of justice
Trying to appease you all

I tell you I think the same
I tell her I think the same
I tell him I think the same
I tell them I think the same
But what I really think
Has been lost
Because I much too afraid
Of losing
You
Her
Him
Them

They call me Peacekeeper
The one with all the patience
The one who sees it all
But someday I’m going to lose it
And find myself

July 11th – Me and Poetry

This poem is addressed to all of my readers–yeah, you! It’s a fun poem that I wrote on a whim, to be honest. 😀 It also marks me being on schedule again! …yeah, let’s see how long THAT lasts, shall we? 🙂

Me and Poetry

I suppose I should finally let you know
That up until I few months ago
I found poetry to be
Horrible
Useless
Annoying
And I refused to write it

I don’t think I need to tell you
That this opinion has changed
And now I find it
Fun
Relaxing
Therapeutic
And essential to my writing life

I believe, then, I should warn you
I don’t intend to stop
Even if my words are
Muddled
Silly
Confusing–
You’ll just have to deal with it

July 9th – It’ll Get Better

Hello again! Yeah, I know, it’s been a few days … oops. I’m TRYING!! 😀 Anyways, I’d just want to let you know that I am trying to get to visiting everyone who was amazing enough to comment on me and if I missed you I’m very sorry. I was literally going through pages of comments! You guys are amazing! Here’s July 9th’s poem:

It’ll Get Better

They always say
It’ll get better
On the days when
You won’t believe it
So you take the words
And tear them up
Into tiny shattered pieces

They always say
It’ll get better
On the days when
You’re convinced it won’t
Because your bleeding heart
Is saying
It’ll only get worse

They always say
It’ll get better
On the days when
The dark is strongest
And you’ve bottomed out
So they know
The only was to go is up

They always say
It’ll get better
On the days when
They see you’ve lost hope
Because they know that you need a reminder
That nothing is horrible forever because
It’ll always get better