August 9th – Knowing Myself

Knowing Myself

When did I go
From the one
Always trying to fit in
To the one
With her foot in her mouth
Who couldn’t care less?
I always used to be the one
Molding myself
To fit whoever’s ideals
So I could be in the middle
It’s a little confusing
Because
I still have no idea
Who I am
But it would seem
Now I know
Exactly who I’m not

July 30th – Mediator, Traitor

Look, the poem that was supposed to be here days ago!

Mediator, Traitor

They call me the Peacekeeper
The friend in the middle
The sibling in the center
Holding up the caution flags
Mediating a truce
They tell me that I’m wonderful
That I’m a true friend
But I don’t feel the same

I don’t want to be the one
Sorting out the facts
I don’t want to be the one
Taking all the blows
I don’t want to be the one
On whom you unload all your crap

I hate to break it to you
But I’m not bulletproof

I love you
I love her
I love him
I love them
But after all this time
Somehow I’ve lost my love of me

You say I play the mediator
But I call myself a traitor
Because I’ve lost my own sense of justice
Trying to appease you all

I tell you I think the same
I tell her I think the same
I tell him I think the same
I tell them I think the same
But what I really think
Has been lost
Because I much too afraid
Of losing
You
Her
Him
Them

They call me Peacekeeper
The one with all the patience
The one who sees it all
But someday I’m going to lose it
And find myself

July 24th – Believe

And yet another one inspired by To Kill a Mockingbird

Believe

Why do we fight
For what we believe in
Tooth and nail
Without pause?
Why don’t we back down
When everyone else
Tells us
We’re wrong?
Where does that strength
And that courage
Come from
To keep us firm?

Maybe I know those answers
Maybe I don’t
But I understand the reality
Of the strength of the people
Who stand up to
Make a case
For what they believe
No matter what happens
Or what anyone says
And they never surrender
Simple because
They believe

July 5th – Denial

All right, all right–I really am trying to keep up over here! I’m always writing, but I’m just not posting. Life and stuff has been busying and otherwise in the way. I suppose I can let my poetry be a testament to that.

Denial

When did this change?
When did it go from fun
To horrid?
From easy
To hard?
I don’t know
But I want to
Because I can’t take the tears

I don’t want to think
That I know why she walked out
The thoughts hurt my head
And blur my vision
With red
I’ll live in denial
Just to make this stop

Because I don’t want to understand
Her why
And I know want to understand
Her feelings
Because if I admit I know
All her reasoning
Then I’ll know my blackest dream
Can be achieved
And I could survive it
So I’ll leave too

June 22nd – My Plan

So I got to thinking today about plans, and how I don’t tend to make them. Yet, when I do, I really hate to have them messed up–like, seriously hate. Yeah, maybe it’s a pet peeve, but I can’t be the only one out there. 😀 So that thought led to another, which led to another, and another and– You outta know that my mind is all over the place by now! Here’s what I ended up with.

My Plan

I had a plan
But you decided
Now wasn’t the time
Wasn’t the place
You said it should wait
I should change the hour
Switch the day
You suggested maybe
I should forget about it

I had a plan
That you didn’t like
That scared you
That kept you up at night
So you didn’t think it was right
And you felt the need
To squash it
And you thought I’d just
Let it go

I had a plan
That didn’t involve you
And still doesn’t involve you
Because I knew how you’d react
And I don’t care
Since this is my choice
My adventure to have
And perhaps you’re right but
It’s my mistake to make

May 30th – Real Revolution

The inspiration for today’s poem actually came from the four page paper I was writing for Honors World History about The Age of Revolution (look it up, it’s good to know these things :D). One of the criteria for the essay was “a clear definition of revolution.” While what I wrote in my essay is far less poetic, my poem is an extension of my train of thought for that message.

Definition of Revolution: Noun, a sudden, radical, or complete change

Real Revolution

Revolution is a pot of water

Still until it starts to simmer

Steaming up the room until

It finally boils over

Revolution is a net

Bringing a myriad of people together

With invisible strings

And binding them together

Revolution is a flame

Lit by a burning few

Who throw some well-worded matches

Into a thirsting wood

Revolution is a wave

Starting far out at sea

Crashing onto hometown shores

While its ripples ride onto foreign beaches

Revolution is a ball

Rolling onward forevermore

Bouncing roughly but never breaking

Turning the world on its head

May 29th – Hidden Rebel

Do not ASK where this poem came from because I have no idea. I just started thinking about how no one really knows the real you and how annoying it is when people are just so sure they know you and yet they have no clue. I’m pretty sure everybody’s gotten that at some point!

Hidden Rebel

I say

This is me

And you believe me

Easily

It’s hysterical

The way you think

You know me

If I showed up tomorrow

With my hair

Dyed blue

Would it shock you?

Or maybe if I

Drove up

On a Harley

Your mouth would

Drop

You don’t know me

You ignorant soul

Who thinks I wouldn’t

Dye my hair and

Gun the throttle

And leave you behind

Forever